Chapter 1: The Essence of Self-Awareness

I once believed I was self-aware simply because I engaged in self-reflection. However, I often found myself lost in my thoughts and feelings without truly seeking clarity. My journey into the meaning of self-awareness led me to Tasha Eurich’s research, which revealed some surprising insights.

Eurich’s studies involving nearly 5,000 participants indicated that while many individuals consider themselves self-aware, only about 10% to 15% actually are. A particularly intriguing finding was that those who frequently engage in introspection often report lower job satisfaction and overall well-being. This hit close to home for me, prompting me to take Tasha Eurich’s Insight Quiz. This quiz consists of two parts, so I asked my partner—who knows me best—to evaluate my self-awareness as well.

To my astonishment, I realized that my level of self-awareness was quite low and that my approach to introspection had been misguided. Consequently, we will explore what self-awareness truly is, the two distinct types of self-awareness, and how to effectively practice self-introspection for greater awareness.

Chapter 2: Defining Self-Awareness

In a recent reflection on my self-discovery journey, I emphasized the importance of knowing oneself as it influences every aspect of life. Self-awareness serves as the foundation for this journey, enabling us to comprehend our identities and our impact on others and the surrounding environment.

Various experts have defined self-awareness in insightful ways. Kendra Cherry describes it as the ability to recognize and understand the elements that shape our identity, including personality, actions, values, beliefs, emotions, and thoughts. Stephen Warley adds that while general awareness involves noticing external factors, self-awareness focuses on introspection.

To summarize, self-awareness encompasses understanding that our self-perception may differ from how others perceive us. This realization was pivotal for me; I initially thought self-awareness was solely about my self-image, but it also involves empathy and understanding how our actions affect others.

The video "What is Self-Awareness + 5 Reasons It's Important" delves deeper into the significance of self-awareness and its role in personal development.

Chapter 3: The Two Dimensions of Self-Awareness

Self-awareness can be categorized into two types: Internal and External self-awareness. Internal awareness pertains to self-perception, while external awareness relates to how we are perceived by others.

Internal Self-Awareness

Internal awareness involves a clear understanding of one’s values, passions, and reactions, as well as recognizing the effects these have on others. High internal awareness often characterizes introspectors, who know themselves well but may not challenge their beliefs.

External Self-Awareness

Conversely, external awareness requires recognizing how we are viewed by others. This can be challenging, as it often leads to concern about external opinions. Those with high external awareness may prioritize others' perceptions, sometimes at the expense of their values.

It's crucial to note, as Eurich points out, that having high internal self-awareness does not guarantee high external self-awareness.

Chapter 4: Effective Introspection for Enhanced Self-Awareness

Upon realizing my lack of self-awareness, I learned the importance of asking "what" instead of "why." Introspection is a valuable practice for examining thoughts and feelings, but often, we start with "why" questions. For example, “Why am I feeling this way?” or “Why did this happen?”

According to Eurich, asking "why" can lead to incorrect conclusions, excessive rumination, and a focus on anxieties. Instead, shifting to "what" questions allows for a more objective and proactive mindset.

For instance, after being laid off, my initial reaction was to question, “Why me?” However, by reframing my thoughts to “What circumstances led to this decision?” I gained clarity that the company was facing financial difficulties, making my individual performance irrelevant.

This perspective shift helped me respond more constructively rather than taking the situation personally. So, remember to prioritize "what" over "why" in your introspective practices—whether through journaling, meditation, or reflective thinking.

The video "Are You Too Self-Aware? [The Self-Awareness Paradox]" explores the complexities of self-awareness and how to navigate its challenges effectively.