Chapter 1: The Uneasy Transition

Upon entering my room, a strange discomfort settles in. It lacks the warmth of a true home, caught in a temporary state. This reality feels odd, especially as I anticipate a longer stay than any of my university experiences. Yet, a sense of unpredictability lingers, akin to standing at the edge, waiting for an elusive signal.

The job application process adds to this tension. Could securing a position provide the structure I've been craving? This seems reasonable, right? Oddly, despite having ample time, my days feel both limited and ephemeral.

The intricate nature of family relationships also contributes to this complexity. While their love and care are reassuring, they introduce additional layers to navigate. Learning how to coexist in this environment has become a new skill for me. Paradoxically, with the realization that solitude is an option, I find myself not fully embracing it.

Engaging with my puzzle offers a comforting distraction. I no longer require the background noise of a podcast; the act itself is stimulating enough. However, amidst this emotional turbulence, I find myself in a strange limbo, caught between uncertainty and a fear of commitment. This tension sparks moments of anxiety, tempered by my hesitance to fully embrace permanence.

Recognizing the necessity for reflection, I yearn to connect with my inner self, to decipher these feelings, and to accept them wholeheartedly. Deep down, I know this is essential. Yet, amidst the chaos of job hunting and life's unpredictability, these concerns loom large. This urgency is not new; it has followed me throughout my life. I recall the struggle of aligning my dreams with my true self.

If I were to retreat into solitude, loneliness might occasionally creep in. In such moments, the pressure to succeed would feel lighter. I would find joy in life's simple pleasures, savoring experiences and navigating the rich tapestry of life. But reality is not so solitary. While family and friends are cherished blessings, they also bring external expectations and opinions. I long for a time when self-reflection thrived, free from the lens of outside judgment—a compassionate and accepting perspective rather than a critical one.

Currently, finding a job feels crucial—an avenue for independence and a way to ease my family's burden. I yearn for a life beyond these walls. Yet, in an alternate reality devoid of these pressures, where financial concerns and obligations fade away, I would dive into an oceanic realm. Much like the uncharted territories explored in "My Octopus Teacher," I would dance, laugh, and find peace in that vastness. I would intimately study nature, forging deep connections until I became one with its essence. Confident strides would accompany gentle encounters as I explored new dimensions and species, traversing a world that feels otherworldly.

Amid these realizations, I would crave companionship—a confidant to share my adventures, experiences, and insights. This bond would reflect the extraordinary nature of my existence. Unbound by the constraints of work, I would transcend traditional boundaries, discovering a symphony of exploration within the infinite sea.

As my thoughts drift, the ocean's allure remains—a beckoning dream yet to be fully realized. This aspiration embodies a profound longing—a quest to uncover the ocean within ourselves. Through this journey of introspection, my waking life could transform into the dream I've always desired—a life where I become the architect of my own reality.

The video titled "My Liberation Notes | Official Trailer | Netflix [ENG SUB]" encapsulates the struggle for authenticity and the quest for self-acceptance. It portrays the intricate dynamics of life and relationships, resonating with those seeking to navigate their own paths.

Chapter 2: The Call of the Ocean

As I contemplate my dreams, the ocean represents a profound yearning—a realm of discovery that beckons me. This exploration holds the potential to reshape my reality, guiding me toward a life where I can fully embrace my identity and aspirations.